Chapter 79
Darkness surrounds her. Jian Yao lies down in the small bed. It seems she is only person left in the world.
She touches the bed sheets underneath her body. Xie Han changed a new set of bed sheets for her today. It smells freshly laundered. But this smells reminds her of home.
She misses her mother. She misses her sister. She misses Xunran, and she misses Bo Jinyan most.
In this place where there’s no way of differentiating whether it is night or day…. Where are you… my love?
Before Xie Han left her, he injected some drugs into her. Her arm is full of needle holes.
But it didn’t produce hallucinations like the previous drugs. Instead, memories comes flooding to her. Sweet memories, bitter memories… they just appear in her mind uncontrollably.
The night when she touched Bo Jinyan’s scars on his back for the first time. Her tears swelled up in her eyes. What did he say to her then?
Under the gentle and soft lighting, his handsome but proud face looks at her with regret and concern: “If I knew this would make you cry, I would not have shown you.”
His rich low voice, sounding like beautiful music notes played by a cello, rings in her ears. His warm breath, his sensual touch, filled with love and his adoration for her…. Jian Yao falls into a dreamy fantasy where he is beside her, wrapping his arms tightly around her…
Suddenly, a big vacuum sucked away her lover. Then, the voice of another man rings in her ears: “I will be the one that live. The one and only… Allen.”
No!
Jian Yao puts her hands over her face.
No. She does not believe it. Bo Jinyan cannot have split personality. He is strong and tough. Even though he is walking in darkness, his heart is still pure and clear.
Her Bo Jinyan. the one and only… Simon. No matter what she hears. No matter what happens next. There is only one thing she can do -
Believe in him. Wait for him.
He will unlock this hell and rescue her.
——————
“Pang!” The sound of the light switch being turned on. The blinding light causes Jian Yao to cover her eyes with her hands. She hears a familiar footage behind her.
Jian Yao’s heart pounds.
He, is here again.
————————
There is smell of coffee in the air. Jian Yao is forced out of her cage back to the sofa again.
Xie Han is still in a good mood. He’s whistling again. He brings over a cup of coffee and put it in front of her.
Jian Yao’s face is very pale. She doesn’t pick up the cup. Xie Han gets himself another cup of coffee. He takes a sip, then he smiles: “Drink it. Or I will whip you.”
Jian Yao takes the coffee and sips it slowly. He smiles.
After she has drinks about a third of the cup, he suddenly says: “Oh… I forgot to tell you, I added something special in the coffee.”
Jian Yao pauses. She looks at the cannibal that is sitting before her. A disgusting thought comes to her mind. She starts throwing up into the rubbish bin next to her feet.
Xie Han laughs loudly: “What I wanted to tell you was… I added milk in the coffee.”
Jian Yao takes a deep breath. She takes a tissue from the table and wipes her mouth. Then she looks ups and meets his gaze. She quickly looks down again.
Bo Jinyan is right. He has an unstable and anti-social personality.
At the moment, he is in a good mood, making fun of her. But he might change his mind and want to kill her a few minutes later. He’s so unpredictable.
God, please protect me from this monster. I must live to the day Jinyan comes for me. Just don’t upset him.
With this thought, She quietly sits and observes what’s his plans are today.
He sits beside her, throws today’s newspaper on the coffee table and turns on the TV.
Jian Yao quickly glances at the newspaper. It’s the classified section. There’s an ad that says: “Jack, do you like my present?”
It’s a message from Tommy.
Her heart swells and trembles with bitterness. She looks up at the TV screen. It’s news time.
The same news presenter from yesterday brings more news on Bo Jinyan. Her clear and calm voice pierces Jian Yao like a sword: “Both the Chinese government and the FBI refuse to comment on the “Bo Jinyan case’. This has upset a lot of family members of the victims. This morning, more than 200 people gathered outside the FBI headquarters in Washington to protest. They are petitioning for the arrest of Professor Bo Jinyan. We have news that a few families have appointed the famous litigators from Davis Law Firm. They will be suing Professor Bo…”
“A lot of people believe that he has split personality.” Xie Han sips his coffee again. “What about you?”
Jian Yao keeps quiet.
Xie Han looks at her coldly.
Jian Yao clenches her hands that’s resting on her knees.
Does he believe?
How should she answer him without provoking him?
Jinyan, what should I say?
————-
“I don’t believe it.” Jian Yao says softly: “He is not like that.”
Her voice is soft and coarse, but there’s trust and faith in her voice.
Xie Han laughs again. But he didn’t comment.
They continue to watch the television.
It’s a building that Jian Yao recognises. it’s the hotel she stayed in before being kidnapped. This is also the place where Bo Jinyan has isolated himself from the rest of the world for a few days now.
“Oh…” Xie Han sits straighter on the sofa. They can hear the news presenter’s voice: “Breaking new. Our reporter brings you the latest developments from the Marriott hotel. The FBI has arrived, and Professor Bo Jinyan has finally left the hotel room.”
Then Jian Yao’s body is numbed. Because for the first times in days, she sees Bo Jinyan. The man that she misses so much!
He is surrounded by a big group of FBI agents. He is wearing a tidy black suit, with a simple shirt. No tie. He looks palm and calm. As the camera flashes, he turns around. Inside his dark eyes, there’s a coldness that is enough to freeze you with just a glance.
Tears streams uncontrollably down her face. Her vision is blurred. She tries to wipe the tears, but it just keeps flowing.
“Tears of desolation. Your subconsciousness believes he has split personality.” He smiles.
No. She does not believe. She says in her heart. Never. Bo Jinyan does not have split personality. He is trying to mislead her.
“If Bo Jinyan’s girlfriend confirms in a letter to the public that he has split personality…” He takes out a syringe from the drawer and walks towards her: “That would make things even more interesting,”
Jian Yao can only watch him inject more drugs into her. A coldness runs through her veins.
Another run of mental control and manipulation. How long can she defend her position?
—————
It’s been a few long and painful days for many people.
Anam lives in the same hotel as Bo Jinyan. He wakes early in the morning.
It’s been two days since Bo Jinyan has been taken away by the FBI. On his computer, he can see the surveillance images of the FBI headquarters’ various entrances, stairways, interrogation rooms, and the temporary detention cell for Bo Jinyan.
Everything is as per normal. Bo Jinyan is lying straight as a pole on the single bed. He is separated with the guards by the rows of metal bars. The guards are walking up and down the corridor.
Anam stares at the screen for a while. Bo Jinyan looks tired and gaunt. There are bags under his eyes. He has lost weight.
Anam switches on the TV. It’s a morning filled with controversy. There’s more and more pressure from the media to press charges against Bo Jinyan; but they cannot underestimate the voice of support for Bo Jinyan:
The most renowned Criminal psychology professor in Maryland has publicly expressed his support for his most beloved student. He claims that even if there is another personality in him, as long as the primary personality Simon has no knowledge of the second personality’s actions, he is not guilty.
Other people whom he’s saved marched with their families to show their support. They urge the FBI to find out the truth behind the allegations….“How can anyone doubt his integrity when he has given himself so selflessly to save the life of others?”
China has requested to transfer Bo Jinyan to China for further investigations. However, the US has not responded to the Chinese’s request.
….
Anam walks out of his hotel room after he’s seen the news.
———————-
One hour later. In the FBI headquarters interrogation room.
Anam is sitting at one end of the table. Facing him is the man that everyone is discussing lately - Bo Jinyan. Two days of detention has not caused him to change very much. He looks more or less the same as when he first stepped into this building two days ago.
Anam speaks first: “There’s chaos everywhere.”
Bo Jinyan nods.
Anam lowers his voice: “What should we do now?”
Bo Jinyan looks at him, but he does not answer.
——————-
Two days later. In Jian Yao’s cell.
She does not know when the lights were dimmed. Her vision is blurred. Her head is hurting. Jian Yao is lying on the floor, with a sheet of paper and a pen in front of her.
Xie Han bends down and talks to her as a close friend: “Now you know. He has split personality. Do you still love him?”
She is under the influence of drugs. Everything seems to be spinning around her. She lifts her head towards Xie Han’s direction: “Yes, I still love him.”
She is under the influence of drugs. Everything seems to be spinning around her. She lifts her head towards Xie Han’s direction: “Yes, I still love him.”
She is finding it hard to differentiate between reality and illusions. The handsome and gentle man. The blood thirsty killer. And how many people are there with her in that dimly lit cell. One? Two? Is Xie Han? Allen? Both of them? She is so confused. Or perhaps it’s all just a dream… a bad dream.
But whatever it is, it’s too painful.
“Write it down. Tell him everything.” Xie Han sounds more gentle than he’s ever been: “Don’t you want him to know how much you love him? Tell him before you die. That even the world cannot accept his split personality, you will not abandon him…”
Jian Yao looks at him. She focuses her gaze onto his face.
Finally, she reaches out for the pen.
——————-
“Jinyan:
When I was young, I dreamt that one day, I will grow up to be someone like my father - to maintain justice, even if it costs me my life.
Then, I settled for a more ordinary life. I went to school, I grew up and I started work. I thought I walked further and further away from that dream. It’s a regret that I hid deep inside my heart.
Then, I met you.
My dream.
I never said this to you aloud. I love you. But I’ve said it many times in my heart. Every morning when I see you sleeping beside me, every time when I am amazed by your talent, when you put aside your own safety to help those who need you… I tell myself. I am so lucky to have you.
You deserve my love.
But perhaps, I can’t accompany you anymore. I can’t endure it anymore. I am stuck in darkness without an exit. Every morning, I hope to wake up and find you here, to rescue me, to feel your warm embrace, so that we will never part again.
I am sorry Jinyan. I can’t accompany you anymore. Don’t be sad. There’s a lot of people in this world that love you. They will take my place to love you. You will not be lonely in your journey ahead. Live a good life.
I am not sad at all. Really. Because you once belonged to me. Even as I am facing death, my heart is at peace. This is a release for me. Even if I am turned to dust and ashes, I will not forget you. From now on, every sunrise, every sunset, every night, I will hope that I can still meet you and love you in my next life. We will return to the place we met, and I will tell you, personally, how much I love you.
…..
Jinyan, I am sorry. I doubted you. Whenever we were confronted by the perverted killers, when you were the only person that understood them, I was afraid. I feared that one day, you too, will be swallowed up into that darkness. Then, I saw the footage of Allen. Surprisingly, I felt more settled in my heart.
It’s not important. Jinyan. Simon or Allen. It’s not important. You are who you are. My only Jinyan. My love for you will never change, because I believe, you will conquer Allen, conquer Xie Han. You will find me, and bring me away from this hell.
Then, we will return to our hometown. We will return to our house. Please embrace me, even if it’s only my ashes, and sit by the river. Accompany me to watch the sunrise and the sunset. Then, bury me in a place where you can see me everyday.
Do you remember the first time we held hands? We are both stunned. You said I was tickling you. But the truth is, you’ve never held any other girls’ hand before…. So what if I die? We have too many memories together. They will accompany me till I die. I have achieved my dream. I have you. I’ve met my parent’s expectations. I have become someone they wanted me to be. We have solved many cases together. I have no regrets. The only regret I have is that I can no longer accompany you on your life journey.
Please do not be alone. Bo Jinyan. Do not be alone. Live everyday well.
Because I am here. Jinyan. In your eyes. In your heart and in your life.
We will never part from each other.
Jian Yao.”
—————
The next morning.
Anam takes the letter to the FBI headquarters.
A night of quietness. As if he is expecting something, Bo Jinyan is sitting at the table. Anam puts the letter on the table and slides it on him.
Bo Jinyan does not pick it up. Instead, he reads the letter line by line carefully and slowly.
Anam is quiet. He is observing the expressions on his face.
After a long time, Bo Jinyan lifts his head to look at him. But it’s like he is looking through him, and through the cement walls, to the place where she is.
A smile appears on his face. However, his eyes still looks cold and empty.
A coarse and unfamiliar voice speaks. “I need to break out of here.”
Omg! This is so unexpected. Thank you so much for translating. I am on the edge of my seat.
ReplyDeletethx!
ReplyDeleteAh. I dearly hope Jian Yao's written letter actually consists of clues or hidden messages! But I keep reading and reading it all over again but.. I got nothing. Still, Jian Yao is strong. That's a fact. So, I won't give up on both of them! Especially for Jinyan's smile! Never! *dramatic scene*
ReplyDeleteThanks for the chapter. XD
Thanks. Crying while reading this chapter. 😢
ReplyDeleteA coarse and unfamiliar voice speaks. “I need to break out of here."
ReplyDeletethis part scared me D:
Jian Yao's letter is touched my heart. She loved BJY very much and the word "Please do not be alone" is proved that how much she loved him.
ReplyDeleteThank a lot for your kindness to translate this beautiful word for us.
Can't wait to see the next move of BJY.
XOXO
Cheer!
Jian Yao make a clue and i think that clue is... "I am stuck in darkness without an exit." woohoo
ReplyDeleteThaks for the chapter! ^^
Oh my !!! every fiber of my Body was just touched about the letter of Jian Yao to much selfless love !!!
ReplyDelete